.Friday, December 17, 2010 @ 2:08 AM Y
blogged
16 Dec 2010, Thur
the day begins with a cooling weather, despite experiencing a little headache, which was gone after a while. upon receiving a email notification, realize that my passport renewal experience some problems, due to certain aspects not to requirement.
however, i am unable to resolve the photo problem yet, as i am in a rush to head of for work while awaiting news from someone.
the journey to work was not smooth-sailing, as the duration for my bus to arrived was long. and in the end, i took a cab from ubi to parkway, for fear that i will be late. nevertheless, it was also hard to hail a cab, and after 10-15mins, i finali hop on a cab, and managed to reach on time.
at that point in time, my mood was really lousy. i cant believe that a person will not be able to feel the vibration,nor check the hp if there is/are any messages or phone call, while waiting for result. its seems rather ridiculous to me. AND, the MATTER than i cant accept nor figure is that when the person call me, and upon me picking up, the line was cut-off, as the person hang up the phone, Reason being: "saw a friend, so hang up." Its like.................. how can anyone accept such a reason for line being cut off after like 2 rings, and the other party has already accepted the call.
also, if a person has an initial intention, will it be easily affected just by friend walking past?
to me, if an intention can be easily affected, it means that that person do not really hold any meaning to the initial intention.
In Doubts over several matters.....
.Friday, November 12, 2010 @ 7:11 PM Y
blogged
hello my dear blog, its been quite some time again since i update about myself.
i have been doing fine and my exams had ended last thur, 4 nov 2010. it marks the end of my 1.5 yr undergrad program. really wish and hope that all my exams will clear smoothly, and that i will be able to find a job soon :)
9 nov 2010, tues
rise and shine rather early, but went back to slp as the JB outing with my frenz is being pushed back to a later timing due to a heavy downpour. we finali met at arnd 11plus, and headed to the terminal where we cld board the bus and head off to JB. within 30-45mins, we are in JB, City Square mall. headed off the Nandos, to have our lunch, where the menu revolves around chicken of all flavours. had a sumptuous and filling lunch. follow next is our time of relaxation where we shop around, and for me, i even did my first pedicure. oh my! the feeling was good, made me feel like "tai-tai" haha. but time flew by quite quickly, and it was time for us to leave so we headed to get some local delicacies back.
it was a fun and enjoyable day where its a getaway from the hustle and bustle life :)
12 November 2010, Friday
my day was still alright as i headed off to work, and even went to visit my beloved grandma after work, as its been quite some time since i last visited her. bought dinner and some snack for her. after which juz headed home. however, my emotions was rather down.
i have given the kind of emotional and moral support that is required. but, somehow, i felt that its not being reciprocated, and yet, the level of neglection that i am experiencing is increasing gradually as time and days passed by. it seems that i am becoming less and less significant. i realli cant help feeling this way or thinking otherwise, upon the way words are being spoken as a promise, or what had been promised to improve nor changed. it has totally made me feel so life-less and unsure of what i want to do. perhaps, i should quickly find myself a permanent job, and immerse myself with lots of work load, so that i need not think so much, and made myself feel so miserable.
alternatively, i should just keep going out with my friends, have fun, relax and even go abroad for holidays.
i think i should seriously give these two options of mine a thorough considerations.
feeling down, than before :(
.Wednesday, August 11, 2010 @ 1:44 AM Y
blogged
By experiencing mixture of vex-ness and frustration can lead to unsucessful sleep.
Feeling the level of insignificance in your life and holding a great deal of an importance makes one feels and conclude that one would rather like the companion of friends, even to the extent of them being the first in showering you with wishes.
Words of care and concern spoken seems like Dirt that holds no meaning, as it only stays for a second or two, and it will be blown away to somewhere unknown. Promises gave is like an entertaining line of speech – to appease a person and so the sentence will be fragmented.
Despite consistent persuasion, it seems like fun and anticipated enjoyment is non-comparable to the concern and care behind the advice provided.
a sense of heart-breakiness and disappointment emerged . . . .
.Friday, May 21, 2010 @ 11:44 PM Y
blogged
21 May 2010, Friday
it was my 3rd day of internship, and the day started off fine, with the weather juz nice - neither blazing sun nor raindrops. Arrived at the office early as one of the manager gave sis n i a lift as she was also on the way, and passed by our area - very coincidentally, she live very near us.
did the usual work as per the 2 days, juz that today will be different for I will be starting on a new task assigned to me ytd late afternoon - "telemarketing" (updating of databases), meaning I would have to ring up the contacts one-by-one. before making my very first call, I was rather worried as I'm unsure how i should go about doing/making the call despite having a script given to me by my manager-in-charge. As time is drawing nearer and nearer, i started looking through the files and also try out the system a little more and start to make my first call. it turns out fine and I continued on and on and on....... As the calls went on, I started feeling bored and despondent as many of it requires me to callback, but unable to provide with a time that is convenient for me, mani gets no response etc... it might be due to the results i'm getting for myself, it makes the calling very bored, that i keep yawning and on couple of moments, i can feel as if my eyes are about to enter a deep slp, as i keep staring at the screen while waiting for a response.. time seems to crawl sooooooo slowly.. in the afternoon, i encounter problem and some uncertainty, thus went to seek the manager advice. I conclude i made a mistake by making a casual remarks that "i'm so bored" and "asking a qns if i can do some data entry when i m bored by the callin" despite not getting a response, i was being asked qns instead, and also i felt a little disappointed and upset by her speech. thus, i didnt mention much and after providing me with the advice, i headed back to my allocated desk and continued with my task assigned.
in the first 2 days of the internship, she was rather nice, friendly and portray herself as a manager that we, as her "employees" can confide in her our feelings and thinking, BUT....... It Prove me WRONG!
through this it made me come to a conclusion that I should never think that a person (i.e. manager-in-charge) who is friendly and treats its staffs or interns well in the first couple of days is nice. BUT might be the opposite!! perhaps nothing and i mean nothing should be voice to the person-in-charge except consult her when faced with problems and difficulties in the work assigned to me from being mistaken and kinda being "insulted" . wonder if it could be the contributing factors from being pregnant that lead to such attitudes, behaviour and reaction. who can explain to mi?? I felt veri bad able giving "trouble" to a very nice(reali nice) person whe has help mi alot, provide advice, encouragement and concern. i am kinda losing trust in voicing out matters to other people even though they are of managerial position. will I develop a sign of phobia for voicing out to people and become reserved?? i realli do not know........................
.Sunday, May 16, 2010 @ 7:19 PM Y
blogged
16 May 2010,
sunny to rainy sunday
its been a reali reali long time since i last pen an entry. life had been heavily occupied with school, work, tuition, and personal commitment.
during these long period, many many things had happened, causing my life to almost turn upside down, and i nearly reach a stage of break-down, if it is how i should phrase it. one major thing happen when i m in the midst of all my project submission, yet i m like "traveling around". felt drained and exhausted. moreover, things took another turn, when relationship between us siblings almost strained due to a particular matter or i should say - some intervention by another party to make the matter extremely bad. nevertheless, i should say that, luckily, the matter managed to resolve, and relationship between us, siblings was fine. through this, i not only learn that siblings should stand-by one another and also to understand one another.
having experience uncountable UPs and DOWNs in life, my perception and expectations for both my life and myself had changed, and will constantly be changing.
hence, i am becoming to be more demanding of myself and kinda pushing myself to the extreme, keeping myself fully-occupied with various stuffs on any other day, preventing myself from thinking to much.
life is never smooth sailing, have to adapt to the ever-changing aspects in life. there is only mi and mi to care, love and protect myself. should not fully rely on anyone to provide such love, care and protection.
shall write till here...
.Saturday, December 19, 2009 @ 11:18 PM Y
blogged
19 dec 2009, sat
rise and shine earli in the morning as needed to get some important stuffs done.. i wasnt the only one.. my bf and his mum too... we all headed to get the impt stuffs done tgt.. luckily the things went rather smoothly except for a little problem faced along the process.. nevertheless, the stuffs was done.. am realii glad for the hely and assistance provided by them. i am truly gladful and appreciative :)
after which, with my bf and his mum, went to their house. rested for a while and had lunch before my bf and me went elsewhere to get some minor matter done.. in the evening, i went to my grandma place as was inform to be back for dinner. along the way, before turning in to my grandma place, both my bf n i saw that there was a xmas event held at the empty field.. it seems rather happening as there are numerous decorative van-liked vehicles... the lights are bright and is rather eye-catching. however, my bf didnt join mii at my grandma place and headed elsewhere for a short while. the dinner was sumptuous to miie.. was stomach-filling... i oso pack some food home.. realli missed the home-cooked food by grandma, and the prawns cooked by my aunty was reali yummilicious... around 7plus, i left as my bf n i will be going to Mount Faber..
at Mount Faber, we park and went to sit at the nearby pavillion.. cooling weather, and we sat there for a while.. dear had not had dinner.. i pack food and gave him eat... hehe... he likes it... thou short moment but we enjoyed each other's company.. after eating, we put the food back into the car and took a short walk.. reali enjoy and relax..
after a while, we headed back to the car... while otw home, went to grandma house pick sis.. while we were otw home, sis phone rang... oh my.. that phone call ruin my mood for the entire day.. i didnt do anything and was scolded by "someone" Idiot.. its like veri unreasonable and putting blame on others when the person is considered at fault.. (this person is not my bf).
and, when i reached home, saw the frying pan is the basin, while the plate, chopstick and a glass is on the table.. it was used and not washed.. my goodness!!! i am like already so drain out as was busy working and had a long day, yet cacme home, see these kinds of things.. i reali wonder how pple can eat already juz leave the utensils like tt, and pple who see it, can juz simply leave the house with the utensils as it is after seeing it... I Realli, ReaLLi cant believe it!!! without much consideration, i washed up the used utensils.. i think normal reaction of pple who witness these, first reaction will be to washed the dirty utensils rather than leave it there to prevent ants or crocoaches to appear.. am i right to say that??? it seems that i am both partialli right and wrong.. i reali, reali m at a loss..
feeling veri sad, and disappointed.. it seems like a home doesnt seems like a home!!
.Wednesday, November 4, 2009 @ 9:06 PM Y
blogged
4 Nov 2009, Wed
it was a cool morning when i woke up to start my day.. the weather was reali relaxed and i felt kinda energetic.. perhaps, had a good slp adn sufficient rest as the previous night didnt rest enough due to exam preparation. had a list of things to do.. hahah... did some housework; ironing and ultimately, hit the books and notes to start my revision for the next paper.. oh my.... yawn.... .upon seeing the notes.. but... will need to persevere in order to do well or perhaps, hopefulli am able to do well or most importantly, understand what hte questions are trying to ask as ytd paper was reali disastrous.. didnt quite understand the questions asked and didnt expect the qns were mostly revolving around one tem - SPM. oh my.. hopefuli that can score.. no matter what, nida prepare myself to "fight" the remaining "war"..
Also, sis and i prepared dinner together..
we whip out dishes like brocoli with fried bean curd; black pepper toufu with eggs and fried vegetarian sliced fish.. moreover, sis even went to buy chicken wings... what a yummi home-cooked meal.. hahah. had a stomach-filled dinner.. alrighty.. shall nid to hit the notes and books again... shall update again either after the next paper or till the "war" ends... hahahah.. gambatei to all "fighting" the "war"... all the best..
.Tuesday, November 3, 2009 @ 8:47 PM Y
blogged
31 October 2009, Sat
yay! finali this day has arrived. my beloved bf has come back to Singapore from his India Ns training.. finali can see him.. however, cant reali spend much time with him as i'm in the midst of my exams.. realli glad that all was well and his training went smoothly.. nevertheless, we spent some time together.. as i had a friend 21st birthday at night too.. thou time spent was minimal, but i felt reali happie to see him.. he bought mi some gifts from India - titbits and liquor chocolates. reali touched..
KS 21st Bdae
at night,went to Ks 21st birthday for a short while after spending some time with piggy.. hahaha.. was lucky that i arrived on time just before KS was about to cut cake.. thou i was late and felt a little bad, but feli relief as i made it in time.. we sang birthday songs and took some pics.. after a short while, i left as i had other things on as well...
3 Nov 2009, Tues
i am sitting for my 2nd exam today - DC paper.. oh my.. the paper is a disaster paper..had studied almost everything that the lecturer had mentioned and even tried my best to hav an idea of all the case studies mentioned as well as the eaxmples stated in the textbook for all the 3 chapters... however, all those didnt came out.. what was unexpected that the 10 short qns that we are being informed, turns out to be 10 parts in a single qns. moreover, the section B, "short essay qns" was tested mainly on one topics or specificalli on one model - SPM model and is takes up 75% of the total marks for the paper.. good gracious!! how can that be possible? the marks seems easi to score if u know how to answer yet easi to "throw away" the marks if u cant answer it... oh no.... let's cross our fingers and hope that there will be moderation and that i am able to pass this module... i simply cant afford to faill. all in all, i felt that this paper format and focus is reali tricky and totalli unexpected... let's hope for the best... jiayou for the remianinin papers.
.Wednesday, October 28, 2009 @ 8:00 PM Y
blogged
28 October 2009, Wednesday
a cool, breezy morning helps start my day... mood was feeling better as ytd was demoralised over the grade. but, i've told myself not to think of it and to focus on my other exams preparation.
the day went by rather smoothly jus tt, on and off, will feel slpy... read through notes, make notes and did some cooking - for dinner..
had attempt to try two new dishes.. hahaah... they are potatoes with vegetarian sliced fish and belachan long beans with chicken breasts..
potatoes with vegetarian sliced fish
Belachan long beans with chicken breasts
alright... got to continue with my revision and to make my notes... :)
.Tuesday, October 27, 2009 @ 1:23 PM Y
blogged
27 October 2009, Tuesday
yawn.. was reali tiring as had a reali disrupted slp and having problems gettin to bed last night.. believe too mani things were flooding through my mind all at the same time and worried over exams. ytd was the start of the first paper. studied extremely hard for it and put in lots of efforts, thou the weightage was 25%. however, it seems rather hard to score outstanding grades as it looks like the one mark per part of a question is veri difficult to get. but, nevertheless, for tt paper, it over.. still have 2 more papers that is spread throughout the weeks till 9 nov, where its the last paper.
but, today, my mood was totalli ruined and i felt so demoralised after checking the individual assignment grade for OB. it made miie felt totalli lost and moodless to start studying for the remaining subjects. moreover, it created lots of doubts within mie, "if i've made the right choice?" and "if this is the outcome for which i deserved after putting in so more time and effort into this assignment?" this whole grading stuff made miie realli upset and dunno if i shld continue on or shld i give up.. i know tt if i give up now, it'll be like throwing away the money and not gaining anything out of it. if i were to continue on, i m afraid the grades will made up realli disappointed as it wil most likely not be the grades that i am looking for.... i am reali. realii at a loss.. still have 3 more papers to go, but for that subject, the exam is ytd.. so what can i do now? the only thing is to reali pray and hope that the group grades and my exam grades can score realii well, in order to realli pull my grades up for mii... what more can i hope for??? i seriously have no idea about it....